dreams and memories

I woke this morning to sweaty sheets and the corners of a dream cutting into me. I threw off the covers and while I evaporated I recovered pieces of it. And realized it was a memory, not a dream.

One of my earliest memories was being in a white dress (must have been 4 or younger) and new white sandals with metal buckles. I guess mom was talking to friends out by the recreation center, cause she let me go explore. There was a scrubby dry marsh behind the apartment complex, so I carefully took off my new shoes and went wandering in to explore. I have no idea how long I was out there, but I remember the colors and textures of the bushes around me.

When she called me back, I went looking for the shoes, and only found 1 of them. I don't know why, why would I have taken them off in different places? She was furious, dragging me around the area where I thought I'd left them, to no avail. Then she spanked me. That was the part I remember most, being yanked up by my arm and smacked repeatedly for losing an expensive new pair of shoes.

To this day, my mom says she has never spanked me. But she did many many times, the last one I was 12. I remember many of them. How can she blot out every one of them? I remember that I learned to cry and scream as soon as she started hitting me so she'd think she was inflicting enough pain and stop sooner.

And now that I think about it, I've never owned a pair of white sandals in my life.

No Knead Bread

It's all the rage after the NYT article in Nov 2006, and while I was on vacation, a friend borrowed one of my massive Descoware pots to try it. She returned it with a loaf, and I was immediately driven to find the article, recipe and do some experimenting.

Of course, I never go the simple route. I started with 2 c. AP flour, 3 T gluten and 1 c. rye instead of the standard 3 c. AP flour. And my yeast was dead. After getting down to the last 4 tablespoons in the 1lb bag, and sitting in the fridge for 4 years it gave up the ghost. So I had to spend a whopping 2.69 and get another pound. Which will take even longer to use up if I only stick to this recipe, since it uses 1/4t of yeast per loaf instead of the regular 2-3 t.

Because the yeast was dead, or at least badly maimed, I gave it 2 days instead of the standard 18 hours. It still came out perfectly, though even with 2 t of salt, a bit bland.

Now I'm baking an all AP flour with olive oil and herbs de provence, and the whole house is warm with the smell of real bread.

I tend to be lazy when I bake, and don't knead enough (unless it's a really soft dough), so most of my bread is too dense. This really does make a stunning artisianal loaf, and the pot is still clean at the end of it! Less mess, no flour on the counter, and letting time do the work is a brilliant change in the standard bread making process. I've read that if it sits around for a full day or longer, it just gets more sour, which I don't mine. And if you decide not to bake it right away, I'll bet you could just seal it and refridgerate it, bringing it to room temp for a couple hours before baking.

Only major thing I changed is to do the second rise on parchement paper, as it doesn't stick like it tends to do to the towel.

Tea Recipe - Red Pepper Jelly

Misplaced my recipe for Red Pepper Jelly. I think I originally got it from a friend's book about tea recipes. The local market had bright orange bell peppers for .99 a pound, so even though I was going to make this jelly later in the month for a tea, I decided I'd make a large batch now and can it.

Even with the jalapenos and serrano, there is only a hint of bite to the jelly. I prefer this jam to be more savory than sweet. 3 cups of sugar seems like a lot, but it's over 3lbs of peppers.

10-12 large red, yellow or orange bell peppers, seeded and finely diced or processed
3 red jalepenos - as above
1 serrano - as above
3 c sugar
3 T lemon juice
1/4 c Cider vinegar
2 t salt

Remember to cover your hands with plastic gloves or bag when de-seeding the hot peppers. Even a little on
your hands can burn for hours.

Cook all in a large heavy pot over med low heat for 1 hour. Stir occasionally, until jellied consistency, 20-30 minutes.
Taste and adjust salt as needed. Put in sterilized jars and process jars. I filled 5 half pint jars with this recipe,
you may have more or less depending on how much water evaporates. If you don't want to can it, you can store it sealed
in the fridge for a week or longer.

Serve on french bread with cream cheese, or with baked brie, or on gryere gougere. I'll post my favorite gougere recipe soon.