Unprofessional Terms of Endearment

The only people who should be using terms of endearment directed at me are my family and my mate. I do give some leeway to fat southern women, they seem to not be able to help themselves, and I've gotten use to 'how you doing dear' from obese waitress in diners and retail shops.

But I do Not like being assaulted by it at Costco. I hate trips to Costco already, the lines are long, no one knows how to control those huge carts (wide turns, stopping in the middle of the isle, walking slower than a dying elephant, inability to look both ways before turning into the center isle) and it makes me feel distinctly agoraphobic (which is fitting because agora in Greek means market).

To make it all the more unpleasant, I was in the checkout line and had to deal with being called all manner of endearing terms by a very big black male clerk. Not a fat older woman. And he wasn't using it in a 'what would you like to order, dear' manner. He used a term in every sentence, and his tone was the same as you'd use to pick up on a drunk woman in a bar.

It gave me shivers to be called Love, Dear, Darling and Sweetheart numerous times in the 3 minutes it took to buy my crap. I was This Close to reporting him to management just to get the icky skin-crawly feeling to go away. It crossed my mind to loudly ask, 'Have we fucked? Cause if we haven't, you'd better knock off the bedroom talk." Or maybe I should have just called him Sugartits and been done with it.

Mad Hatter's Pottery Candles

I just got some gorgeous little pots and candles and have to share. They are from Mad Hatter's Pottery in North Carolina. I got 2, and now that I see them up close and personal, I want more!

This is how they came wrapped, like lovely presents.

This one is Feng Shui Water.



Gorgeous little handmade pots with soy wax candle. I have to keep them wrapped in plastic cause they are fresh and are Very Strong. I don't have to light them to get benefit, just leave them out for a few minutes and the whole room is scented.

Love the pendant attached with twine.

This is to give size reference. My hands are small, this is a touch over 3" across.

The perfect size for jewelry and trinkets after the wax is burned.


I'm absolutely thrilled with these pieces! I don't want to give them as gifts..

Echoes in an empty skull

Today was one of those days when I can't get out of my own head. No matter what I read, listen to or do, the stress of not having a constant income stream (even ebay sucks as income these days with no one bidding on once popular items) is throbbing loudly in my skull.

I did get a lot done, I have 50 pendants to drop to a bazaar for this weekend, so I spent all day organizing, cutting, sticking and labeling. And more photo editing and ebay. But my head was still full of fuzzy lead and the feeling that something bad will happen soon. No thanks to hearing yesterday that we are officially in a rescession, and have been so for a year. Now that it's official that means people will pull back from buying luxury goods even more. And that's what I make! Food and entertainment are pretty stable choices, but I'm making and selling stuff that is for fun and decoration. Sales have already been sucking for months. Etsy is not doing a good job advertising itself to buyers and no matter what I'm doing with it, it's not enough.

So I have no distraction outlet. No tv, no streaming video (my heatsink went kablooie a week ago and the .. no need to get technical, it overheats if I have more than 1 program open), I can't stay focused on a book, my roommates are not the kind of people I can hang with, all my friends are busy. I called a couple to catch up, but it did nothing to allay my nervous empty discomfort.

Food was the next step. I went to my favorite vegetarian indian restaurant. Completely packed with young scruffy boho types. Food was decent as usual, but I was too distracted to be in the moment and enjoy it. I wanted to sit at a strangers table and have an interesting conversation. On days like this I want to get on craigslist and say 'I want to meet a stranger for dinner, come to -blank- at 7pm and we'll talk about nothing in particular'. But I know it will not turn out as well as my imagination.

Picked up a bag of toffees that totally blew my blood sugar (I can feel the palpitations as I write). I then drove around Palms in exploratory mode. Looking for interesting restaurants, parks, gas prices (1.87!), and I found myself driving north. So now I'm at the boyfriends house blogging, while he is doing the last of another 12 hour day in Culver City.

I've had plenty of days like this when I was desperately looking for a job during the summer, and I'm not liking it at all. It's not something I can get use to.

I don't like not having someone around to talk to, someone to curl up with, someone to discuss events and ideas and nonsuch whenever I want to. And it's making me think about things I thought were long dead. Heck, I'm even feeling bad about breaking up with past boyfriends. Perfectly nice men who were not what I wanted at the time. 15 years later and I'm lamenting my breakup w/ a guy in college. My brain is feeling lonely and it's actively rubbing my face in it.

The bane of the locker room

I've heard from many guys that the bane of the locker room is the guy (no matter what he looks like) who wanders around naked, not even carrying a towel, takes his time getting dressed while boldly talking to people. The rest of us want to get out of the shower, get dressed and get out. It's a nasty locker room (no matte how nice the gym) , no one wants to pop a bottle of wine and hang out there, barefoot and naked.

Well we have these annoyances too. In my gym they have a little workout area in the women's locker room for those who want to stretch, cool down, and do their workout privately w/out feeling eyes on them. It's a little space with exercise balls and floor mats at the far end of the locker room.

I was just going to go swim, and realized I hadn't done ab work in ages, so, since I was wearing seriously scruffy clothes, I went to that workout area. As I walked over, this naked woman was talking to another couple of women who were getting dressed. She shuffled her clothes around in a bag but made no attempt to put them on. She wasn't drying off or anything, just talking loudly and naked.

They left, more women came in. And left. More women came in. And she was Still there yakking loudly to anyone who was in the vicinty about where she worked, what she was doing for the holidays and who she blahblahblah. I finished my 15 min workout and left. She was still naked! Just standing around blabbing, still shuffling her clothes like she was gonna put them on any minute. If you're gonna be a nudist who likes to talk to strangers (none of whom is also standing around naked like they have nothing to do) , doing in a locker room is not the place! Did you leave your brain in your car? Or is it just idling while your mouth is running full speed.

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As I was leaving, a small asian woman told an attendant, in a loud and angry voice, to not move her bag. The attendant said she's not responsible for her bag and wasn't going to touch it . The asian woman responded that the bag was 'too big to fit in a locker' so she just leaves it sitting out. 'I'm only working out for 20 minutes anyway'. She continued on that the last time she left it, someone had the gall to bring it to the front desk!

An unattended bag that someone was nice enough to bring to the front desk/lost n' found. Oh the horror. She's complaining that people were being nice, instead of rummaging through her stuff and stealing it. I had to peer around the corner to see what was up with the special bag, and it was indeed huge. Weekend stay in Maui big. Lady, you came here in a car, leave your shit there.

People are weird. Maybe I should just make this a 'people are annoying and I wish I could slap these strangers' blog.

Use the middle of the intersection

it doesn't matter if you're from connecticut or santa monica - if you are making a left turn, move into the Middle Of The Intersection. Not your front tires into the crosswalk, not your front tires just over the crosswalk, get into the middle of the damn road like a real driver and do it right. You blow it for everyone behind you if you don't do it right.

And if you are not in the middle where you belong, and I'm behind you, I'm going to honk. I fantasize about having a beater car with a huge Smittybilt bumper, so I could dunk into those idiots when they don't drive the way they are suppose to.

Actual conversation in the Post Office

Yesterday, at the Rancho Park Post Office on Exposition in West LA I had yet another odd encounter. That makes 3, and I'm no longer going back. The clerk didn't look at me the during the entire exchange, mumbled everything including the usual (is anything fragile, liquid, perishable?).

For the first time Ever that I've been to a post office, I don't get asked if I want delivery confirmation or insurance (which I did, but blanked on it because I was trying to figure out what was wrong with this guy) AND the clerk doesn't put the postage on the packages in front of me, so I know that he's charging me the same as he's putting on the packages. Before I've even paid, he takes the package and the label, walks over to some other clerk, and has a 3 minute conversation with her while I'm standing there waiting. He throws it in the letter bin and comes back.

I asked him to stamp 'do not bend' on one item and he completely ignores me.

He doesn't stamp 'air mail' on the air mail package. He doesn't even tell me how any of the stuff is being sent, just charges me. I pay 10 bucks for 5.40 worth of postage and put my hand out for the change.Then we have this wierd exchange.



Postal Clerk- so, you want your change back?

Me - um, yes?

PC - well, if it's less than 5 dollars worth of change, we have to ask.

Me- (raised eyebrows while hand is still out) sure, ok

PC - If we give you your change back, we don't get to eat lunch.

Me- um, ok (takes change)

PC - well, looks like there's not lunch for me then. Hope you enjoy yours, with your change.

All this with no eye contact. I grab my receipt and rush out the door. Now I'm looking on the USPS site to see where I can complain, and find a post office nearby that is not filled with nut jobs.

Jerrys Deli $5 minimum

Went to see 'Experimental Bellydance' last night in Venice, and realized that the producer was the woman I took 2 bellydance classes from over a decade ago. She has a modern dance background, so she's skin and bones (kinda weird for a bellydancer), and has a hard edge, rather than flowing and graceful movements. But the show had some memorable numbers and it was a fun evening w/ friends.

After some chow, we decided we wanted something sweet. Everything was closed so we decided on Jerry's Deli in Marina Del Rey. I was stuffed so I figured I'd have a bite of whatever dessert was ordered by the others, and pay half. When it came to me ordering, I said I was sharing, and the waiter told me that it was a $5 minimum per person at the table. WTF?! I can understand that they don't want a single person taking up a whole booth to nurse a coffee for several hours, but this was 3 people, 2 of which were ordering over $20 worth of food, enough to cover the average for the $5 per person. The waiter was having none of it, so I said I'm not buying anything, guess we'll have to leave.

We walked down to Von's and had raspberries, chocolate and vanilla ice cream, and a banana smoothie. We sat at their little service bar and had a wonderful quiet conversation (minus all the noise and bright lights of Jerry's) at well under $5 per person, and no tax and tip on top of that. Fuck You Jerry's. You were already too expensive (somewhere in the late 90's they decided to go from a moderately priced 24 hour deli to a hip, expensive deli, all while leaving their food and decor exactly the same), and now you force everyone at the table to pay a minimum. You've lost my biz permanently.

My new shoes with toes

Got my new vibram five fingers today. It took a lot of looking to find the size and color I wanted. Straight black, not those goofy ones with yellow between the toes. Those make your feet look like a bird flashing his feathers every time you take a step.

I wore them for 4 hours today. The fit easily (the website says they won't fit feet if your second toe is longer than your big toe, and I can see why), and didn't make my feet sore or rub in spots like All running shoes do for the first couple days. The only thing that is sore is some unused muscles in my feet and toes, since they are not use to being part of the process of getting from here to there. They are waking up.

It's not the same was walking around the house barefoot. Walking in the driveway, down to Fish King, around the block, I feel like I shouldn't be out there. After 5 years old, your mom always made you put on shoes before leaving the house (when young I suppose you would venture no further than the grass in the yard). I feel like I'm missing something around my feet. No socks, no stiff sole.

I'm walking with a shorter stride, if I use my normal long stride I find I'm banging my heel into the cement. Shorter steps allow my feet to move in a natural way, and I love the feeling of my toes being separate and functional.

I'm hoping they fix my hammer toes, all mashed and bent from years in shoes. I'm going to the gym tomorrow to see how they feel on the treadmill.

Photos of my little feet in black are forthcoming.

First time Golfing

Took Rimas out for his birthday last week to play golf at:
4141 Whitsett Ave
Studio City, CA 91604

I'd never played anything but miniature golf in my life. My grandfather had a house in Pebble Beach and was an avid golfer. I always saw it as a pretentious game played by doctors and lawyers who needed to rub shoulders and play the proper status games. The community course is short, nothing over 200 yards (they call it 'pitch and putt'), it was a gorgeous day, it was inexpensive (2.50 for set of clubs, $9 for the course, $7 for a bucket of balls to warm up on the driving range), and there were singles playing the course so it wasn't much crowded at all.

It was fun, I enjoyed it, I said fuck a lot, and now I need to find some lefty clubs if I want to play more than a couple times this year. I re-injured my shoulder by not warming up first, so I've spend the last few days in great discomfort.

Places I've lived and visited

Places I've been


visited 15 states (6.66%)
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visited 28 states (56%)
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